I've always thought celebrating birthdays to be strange. I mean that's the one day in my life that I had absolutely nothing to do with -- I can't even take credit for having the will to be born; my mother had to have a C-section to get my lazy butt out into the world. Really, y'all should be sending her a cake.
I suppose it's a celebration of managing to keep myself alive for another year. But for me today it's not only about keeping myself alive another year but rediscovering my life in the past year.
I distinctly remember being freaked out about my birthday last year. About turning 26 and feeling like I had no better handle on life than I'd had at 16. I was mentioning how different my life is now compared to a year ago to my friend Jigsha yesterday morning. 'You've blossomed since then,' she said to me. I love how she put that because that's exactly how I feel (save the cheesy notion of blossoming from a young girl into a woman or something like that).
I don't know if it was my relationship with the Modern Ex that held me back from living the life I love or my breakup with him forcing me to finally go find and live the life I love, but I've found it. I don't know how to put it into words other than to say I feel like myself in a way that I hadn't in a long, long time. I enjoy the things I do and the company of my friends. I feel healthy. I appreciate my job a little more than I used to (though granted, it still drives me crazy at times). I feel healthy. I'm more resilient to bumps in the road, large and small.
I'm very, very excited about turning 27 ... 26 put up a hell of a fight, taking me down to the bottom before kicking me back into gear. Well played, 26, well played. I'm excited to take this newfound energy in my life and see what I can do with it in the coming year.
So celebrate, I'ma gonna starting with a birthday dinner with the cute boy tonight (yes, I'll get around to talking more about him eventually) and watching what better damn well be a National League victory in the All-Star Game tomorrow night. Saturday I'm spending eating, drinking, dancing and generally being merry with my friends and Modern Roxy who's going to be in town for the weekend. Woo hoo!
I'm ready to show 27 who's boss. Who's joining me?
Regardless of having nothing to do with my actual birth, I have felt like a million bucks today thanks to all the calls, e-mails, Facebook and Twitter messages and these lovely flowers from Officemate and Mrs. Officemate's garden that were sitting on my desk this morning. I'm so humbled by the love from all my friends and family Thanks, everyone.