Public service announcement

Modern Friends, after several months of banging my head against the wall I've managed to tie down a slightly better domain name in themoderngal.com and have located hosting space and have installed wordpress.org and all that great jazz that the rest of you figured out a long time ago. I'm in the process of attempting to migrate my blog over that way. Take that obnoxious comment spammers!

*Hopefully* you won't notice a change in your RSS feeds, but if you do, I apologize in advance. I'm totally feeling my way through this as I go. I'll try to make you aware when the deed has been done, but if you notice things seem wonky around here, check themoderngal.com instead.

Stay: The lady behind the book

Have you gotten your copy of Stay yet? No??? Here's the Amazon link. I'll STAY here and wait until you take care of that.

...

Now that you've taken care of that, Allie did me the huge favor of answering some of the questions I had about Stay, and I hope you'll enjoy her answers as much as I did:

MG: While reading, I noticed several Allieisms in Stay: Van and her mother's love of Boston and an exchange where Van and Agnes call each other 'Lady.' How much of your own personality did you put into Stay, and are there other big examples of yourself within the book?

AL: I think it has kind of become one of those life imitating art imitating life things. A friend of mine in college had a Boston CD, and played it all the time. When I left college and was feeling nostalgic, I got my own copy. I liked Boston, but it was more about the nostalgia than the music. But the CD turned into a joke between J and I.

In an early draft, I was trying to figure out what CDs Norman would have in his car, and which one Van would actually like, and it occurred to me that Van would like Boston, and that it would be a closet obsession. But then, in the process of writing Van and listening to the Boston laden playlist I made for her, I started loving Boston on a level that goes way beyond nostalgia. And there is no better way to get myself in the right mindset to write Van than to listen to More Than A Feeling.

Another big “Allieism” are the locations in the book. I moved up to Rochester in 2000. I grew up in Westchester, about 30 minutes north of Chappaqua. And I used a lot of real locations or elements of life in Westchester. My friends used to go bridge jumping. I still dream of Bueti’s sandwiches, and when I was a nanny, I used to take my youngest charge to Gedney Park to run around.

But all of these things are very much seen through Van’s lens, not mine. It’s sometimes a very subtle difference, but it is a difference. And I swear to you that I am not in love with any of my friends’ husbands, nor have ever bought a dog off the internet.

MG: Joe seems like such a great dog! Is he modeled after any dogs you know? And is it really possible to order a German Shepherd online? Should I warn the Modern Love Machine about potential drunken dog ordering?

AL: Argo was absolutely the inspiration for Joe. But Argo is an incredibly easy-going dog. He’s really amazing, and I wish we could take credit for that, but he just showed up that way – open and loving and happy to meet anyone who comes his way. He is quite eager to please, so he responds very quickly if he knows he’s done something wrong. Using Argo almost verbatim as the model for Joe, didn’t really ring true. In earlier drafts, Joe was too perfect, and it didn’t serve the story as well. Luckily, Stella became a member of our family, and brought with her several months of floor pooping, crate chewing chaos. Joe’s incidents are not Stella’s, but she certainly gave me lots of inspiring material before she calmed down and stopped making me want to run away from home.

Yes, you can actually import a dog from Slovakia. One of my friends posted the book trailer on his Facebook wall, and his friend commented that she got her dog from Slovakia and had him flown over. That said, getting a dog from your local German Shepherd Rescue organization is a wonderful way to go.

MG: Since we're on the topic of characters ... you've mentioned before on your own blog and Twitter that you really got to know your characters and you missed them when Stay was finished. How did you make them so realistic? I feel like I've known them my whole life!

AL: Thank you so much! I am thrilled to hear that you related to the characters in STAY so well. I feel like I’ve known them my whole life too.

I originally went to school for theatre, and I think taking acting classes has been a hugely positive influence on my writing. We really learned how to dissect characters. When we studied a scene or a monologue, what wasn’t on the page was just as important as what was.

At one point, I worked on a student directed scene from a play called Betrayal, by Harold Pinter. I played a wife who is confessing to her husband that she’s had an affair with his friend. The scene is incredibly tense and loaded, but, because it’s Pinter, there are very few words. What isn’t said is just as important as what is. The student directing the scene knew that it was important for my scene partner and me to have a strong sense of context. Before we even got to the script, he had us spend a week or so improvising scenes from the life of a couple becoming a couple and then starting to fall apart: our first date, the marriage proposal, a typical night in our home, when the fighting started, the concealing of the affair. When we finally got to the scene we performed, there was a sense of loss. There was a context for the argument that went far beyond words.

I learned SO much in that process. I don’t hang out in my office acting out background scenes for my characters, but I do make sure I give them that kind of context. I spend a lot of time thinking about the things that don’t happen in the story, and I allow myself to write scenes I need to work through, even when I know they won’t end up in the final draft.

MG: And lastly, when should we be expecting your next novel? Do you have any ideas what it might be about?

AL: I’m not quite ready to talk about my next novel in any kind of specific terms, but I can tell you that there will be no mention of grape Kool-Aid anywhere in it! Writing those scenes where Van drinks way too much of it created a pretty bad aversion to all things fake grape flavored.

Pennypup reads Stay aloud to Lucydog, who really is interested despite appearances

For more by Allie, check out her short story Bathtub Mary and her personal blog Incidents and Accidents.

Stay: Four paws up

So this post is way, way, way overdo, but I didn't want to sit down and write it until I had legitimate time and brain power to give it the focus it deserved. You may have read on some other awesome blogs about Allie Larkin's new novel, Stay, but just in case you didn't, I wanted to introduce you to Allie and Stay! Really, even if you know about Stay and lucky enough to know Allie, I think you should still read :)

Almost three years ago I got to reading Allie's blog about all things green, then known as Allie's Answers (now The Greenists, and yes, the same Greenists that I contribute to ... P.S. I posted there yesterday about green wedding dresses, feel free to give it a look-see.). The thing that set her blog apart from all other green-oriented blogs was her voice -- it was incredibly clear, personal and warm, despite Allie's Answers not being a personal blog per se. Through mutual blog commenting, Twitter exchanges and e-mails, I found about Allie's passion for writing and her love for her dogs, Argo and Stella.

Like all of Allie's friends, real and internet-related, I was cheering her on big time as she wrote, sold and edited Stay. When the time came for me to get my hands on Stay, I absolutely could not wait! It arrived at the new house just as I was moving in, and it was the only thing that distracted me from my duty of unpacking the new place because it was THAT GOOD. (Seriously, when I move to a new place I let nothing interrupt my quest to get settled in.)

Stay in its now permanent spot on our now unpacked bookshelf

It's a story about a gal named Van, a grape KoolAid and vodka-fueled drunken impulse purchase, a dog named Joe and the puppy love -- both the human-to-human kind and the human-to-puppy kind -- that ensues. This video will say it better than I can:



Tomorrow I'll have an interview with the author herself, so stay tuned!

Baseball, and a whole lot of it

Thank you so much for all of your comments on that last post! It's reassuring to know there are others who have either gone through this or feel the same way. Let's figure this all out together. I'll be sharing more details about what I'm studying and considering as time goes on.

But it's Friday, and I'm so terribly excited because these weeks are starting to stretch out longer and longer (although my life will start getting super-busy again next month, so I'm trying not to complain). In celebration of Friday and the fact that my beloved Cardinals are back where they belong in first place of the NL Central, I'd like to share some observations on all the baseball parks the Modern Love Machine and I visited during the two-week road trip.

I think I mentioned this last year after attending the game at U.S. Cellular in which Mark Buehrle threw a perfect game for the White Sox, but I've made it my business to attend a home game of every MLB team. I mean, I went to a game at Tropicana Field in the NINETIES, back when the Rays were the Devil Rays and they didn't know how to play baseball. Heck, I've even been to a Blue Jays game in Toronto, which, if you're from the South, Toronto might as well be in Russia because it's so far away from home.

This trip added two new stadium experiences to my list, bringing me to a total of having witnessed 11 MLB teams at their home stadium and 13 stadiums (I've been to two out of the three incarnations of Busch Stadium and San Fran's Candlestick and AT&T parks).

1. Cinncinati, The Great American Ball Park

I liked Cinncinati's Great American Ball Park the least of the four we visited, but probably for reasons that have nothing to do with the park itself. I mean, it's not horrible. It's settled on the banks of the Ohio River with a view of northern Kentucky -- not that there's really anything to see when looking at northern Kentucky. I was more irritated by the weather that delayed the start of the game by an hour (we were on SERIOUS deadline to get to Milwaukee that night) and the fact that it alternated rain and extremely steamy heat throughout the game. Plus, I could not care less about the Cincinnati Reds or Cleveland Indians, despite the fact that the Reds at the time were ahead of my beloved team.

I guess I'd never experienced a serious weather delay at a ballpark before, because when we saw the sky turning black over right field, I wasn't really sure what we were supposed to do.

Now I know that during severe weather delays you crowd the concourses below the stands and try not to tempt the weather gods into striking you with lightning. You also attempt to Facebook from your iPhone only to find that the other 30,000 fans are doing the same thing, thus rendering your phones useless.

2. Milwaukee, Miller Park

I had never been to Milwaukee's Miller Park, and I have to commend Brewers fans for their commitment to beer and tailgating. Their tailgating commitment rivals that of Southern college football fans. The MLM and I joined two friends in Milwaukee and had a proper tailgate, which was cut fairly short because of afternoon naps and a need to assemble the tailgaiting grill. Still it was glorious.

I really enjoyed Miller Park, possibly because I was overstimulated with things to look at inside. I happen to love the coziness enclosed ballparks, and if I remember correctly, the game that was going on between the Brewers and the Houston Astros was one of the better of the four games we saw.

I was most excited about the Sausage Races. Unfortunately, my companions decided to place their dollar bets on which sausage would when while I was in the restroom, so I was stuck with a choice of Chorizo or Italian Sausage. I chose Chorizo because of his cute sombrero. I should have gone on taste and chosen Italian Sausage, because of course he won.

The MLM chose the Brat, who I believe is not in this photo because he was busy tripping somewhere behind home plate. Yes, Mr. Brat came in dead last.

3. Chicago, Wrigley Field

Either it's ridiculously hot or ridiculously cold every time I go to Wrigley, so you'd think I would plan accordingly. Nope, I wore shorts and a T-shirt when we went to watch the Cubs and Pittsburgh Pirates, and my teeth chattered until I broke down and bought a long-sleeved T-shirt that neither mentioned the Cubs nor was blue (it was brown and said Wrigley Field and eventually became a gift for the Modern Mom). But it's hard to argue with the beautifully blue sky.

As much as I hate the Cubs, Wrigley is a wonderful place to see a ballgame. I love the minimal commercialization there (though hate the constant ads for Six Flags on the monitors -- serously, get a new theme song, Six Flags!) I had mixed feelings about the scoreboard this time, though. I love watching for the numbers to change in hopes of seeing one of the dudes that man the scoreboard, but missed out on all the stats and details that you glean at parks with honking huge videoboards.

I did not actively root against the Cubs, although I didn't need to as they managed to beat themselves against the worst team in the National League.

4. St. Louis, Busch Stadium

Busch is clearly my own personal promised land.

Though I miss the old cookie-cutter Busch Stadium, I think new Busch does it best among the new old-timey parks like Great American or Atlanta's Turner Field. Downtown St. Louis provides such an awesome setting, especially with the Arch in the background.

The Cardinals obliged by winning the night that we were there, so that added to the beauty. I will bitch about one thing though, Cardinals: your concession prices were the most ridiculous of any along our trip. The logistics of transporting beer from the Anheuser-Busch brewery a few blocks away from Busch Stadium cannot be so difficult that you're required to charge $8 for a Bud Light.

Reinventing myself

I had a really crummy week at work last week for reasons I won't get into, but suffice it to say I'm tired of dealing with the same old BS that makes work difficult at times. It's not something that bothers me 100 percent of the time, but it keeps rearing it's ugly head.

BUT. I'm not just going to complain about it. I am finally doing something about it. Really.

No, I'm not quitting. I'm too practical to do something like that, and I'm a whore for my paycheck because it's a pretty decent paycheck for what I do. I even enjoy it occasionally. I'm just finally working on plans for life beyond this job though, whenever that time may come.

My major challenge is that I have a very limited skill set. I'm really, really good at writing but not much else. Despite what my advisers may have told me in college, being able to write does not immediately open up a myriad of doors for you. Writing plus a few other skills like web design or expertise in a particular field can, but writing alone does not. So I'm working on adding some skills. My other challenge is having a work schedule that does not allow me to plan for things like night or weekend classes or seminars, etc.

That's ok, I'm starting small.

The first thing I've done is check out a stack of books at the library to explore things I'm interested in. It seems a little third gradeish, but I need some ideas of what to pursue.

I've also enrolled in online courses at the local college and kicking myself for not thinking of doing that sooner. I knew I couldn't commit to in-person courses, but why couldn't I commit to something that's done entirely on my own time? I mean, I get something like two weeks to complete each lesson -- even I can work with that. The courses are not for credit, just to help me get proficient in other areas.

The Modern Love Machine and I also sat down last night to create a household budget, wherein we pay all our bills, commit to some serious savings but still have a little room to eat well and do some fun things. One of the savings funds we've created may or may not be dubbed 'Exit Strategy.'

I'm considering making a visit to the local college's career counseling center to help me explore some ideas. They have all kinds of aptitude and personality tests that help narrow things down for the undecided student, and I didn't bother to take advantage of that service when I was actually in school. Better late than never, right?

Anyway, I'm writing about this all just to make myself accountable. I'm finally setting some career-related goals that I'm excited about, and I'm trying to do everything I can to follow through. I'll probably write more about what I'm doing down the line, but for now, please share your own stories and career-related advice. I'm looking for inspiration :)

Am I old enough to stop having them?

Tommorow is my 28th birthday. I know you probably won't believe me when I say this, but I honestly kept forgetting that my birthday was on deck until two days or so, and even then I haven't given it a whole lot of thought.

I told the Modern Love Machine that I really wasn't feeling my birthday, and he said that was sad. Except that I've never been one to care a whole lot about my birthday.** I tried making a big to-do about it last year, figuring it had been an up-and-down year and I need to celebrate myself, but it just felt weird and awkward to me when it was all said and done.

Don't get me wrong, I enjoy the cards and Facebook messages. It's nice to be thought of, but I don't want anyone to go out of their way for a day that I really had nothing to do with. Credit the Modern Parents with that one. I didn't even decide to be born -- the docs had to C-section me out.

The MLM offered to cook me a really nice dinner or take me out to wherever I wanted. After a few days of forgetting to think about it, I eventually decided I just wanted pizza -- crispy thin crust pizza like the type that my favorite pizza place of all time serves. And strawberry cake from my favorite bakery.

This year I seem to care less than ever. When the Modern Mom asked me what I wanted for my birthday, I struggled to come up with something. I almost always have ideas for what to ask my parents for. I guess all I really want is for my house to be fully furnished and decorated in a way that I like, all the yet-unpacked boxes of stuff gone, the yard weed-eated and landscaped, the MLM and I to agree on paint colors and more time to enjoy it all.

And world peace.

Seriously on the world peace bit, though.

**The lone exception being my 21st birthday, naturally. Currer Bell and I had a party of epic proportions that still gets mentioned from time to time, thanks to Noodles and Modern Angie. We're talking all-day, moonwalk, drunkenly created homemade slip'n'slide epic.

Kroger fail

The Modern Love Machine, who, as a teacher is off work for the summer, has done most of our grocery shopping and cooking since we moved into the new house, God bless him.

While at work today, I received this text from him:

Look how much I can save! ...

This post ends with gay square dancers

So Auntie mentioned she was going on a road trip soon with her boyfriend and was worried about the trip possibly ending in killing one another, likely over what was being played on the radio. Fortunately, the Modern Love Machine and I didn't have too much trouble agreeing with what to fill the air waves during our countless hours on the road.

The MLM is a huge World Cup soccer fan and has helped me get a bit more into the sport this year, and two segments of our drive coincided with two of the US matches -- the match versus Algeria and the match versus Ghana -- of which ESPN Radio graciously provided us coverage during the drive. I know it's been a few weeks, but you may still remember the meeting with Algeria. The match was tied at nil until the 91th minute when Landon Donovan knocked the rebound off a missed shot into the net and all his teammates piled on top of him at the corner of the pitch? I made the mistake of letting the MLM drive during the match and he nearly wrecked the car for screaming his head off when Donovan scored and then proceeded to honk the horn a few times.

While in Florida, we spent part of a day at a place that had go-karts, mini golf and an arcade because the beach was so seaweedy. We won this little guy playing skeeball, named him Donovan Duck and placed him on the dashboard. He was the mascot for our drive.

Unfortunately, Donovan Duck was no good luck charm as the Yanks followed up that dramatic win with a 2-1 loss to Ghana. The MLM was driving again during that match, and though he didn't nearly wreck this time he did end up moping for many miles.

What we really love to fill the dead space in the car are podcasts of Wait, Wait ... Don't Tell Me, NPR's weekly comedic news quiz (the podcasts are free on iTunes and worth every penny). We always listen to the show if we're in the car when it's broadcast on Saturdays, but I started downloading the podcast replays about seven months ago to get me through some really long drives back and forth across the state of Tennessee. We probably listened to a half-dozen of backlogged podcasts in a row during one particularly long stretch of driving.

When we got to Chicago, we were thumbing through a guidebook that Noodles had left for us at her condo (she graciously let us stay there while she was out gallivanting around Hawaii) and my fingers somehow turned right to the page that mentioned you could observe a taping of Wait, Wait ... Don't Tell Me at the Chase Auditorium in downtown Chicago (which if you listen to the show you already knew) on Thursday nights. 'Wait, wait!' I said. 'Tomorrow is Thursday!' I never realized what day they actually taped, I just presumed it was Friday or early Saturday morning before the show aired.

Thursday afternoon we scouted out the Chase Auditorium a few hours in advance, just to see if POSSIBLY there were any tickets left. We ran into house manager Don Hall, who told us of the waiting list to get in if anyone with tickets didn't show (since the show sells out about 45 minutes after tickets go on sale each and every week). We were a little early to get on the waiting list, so we waited. It was a Wait, Wait wait wait, if you will. We ended up being numbers three and four on the list. We waited some more. We watched about 400-some-odd ticket-holding fans cram in the lobby for general admission seating. Then came the time to see who off the waiting list would make it in. Let's just say it's a good thing we weren't any farther down the list than third and fourth.

So we made it in. And we found (separate) seats in the third and fourth rows! Which looks like this:

And this:


No, no Mo Rocca or Roxanne Roberts or Tom Bodett. We did have Paula Poundstone, P.J. O'Rourke and Julia Sweeney, who were pretty funny although not terribly informed on the week's news. All I can say is it's worth the $22 a ticket or couple of hours of waiting for the Wait Wait wait list if you're in Chicago on a Thursday night. It's waaaaaaaay raunchier and far funnier. Your sides will hurt after laughing for two straight hours. You can get autographs of everyone on stage, or if that isn't your cup of tea, you can have a conversation with Julia Sweeney (she of SNL fame) about peeing in wedding dresses. Yeah, I did that.

They tape two hours' worth of audio for a 50-minute show, which means A LOT got cut. Paula sometimes doesn't make much sense during the broadcasts, but she's much funnier when you get to hear her ramble. We were there for the July 3 broadcast. If you listen to the podcast you won't hear the jokes about how Tang cause erectile dysfunction or anything about the troupe of gay square dancers who happened to be in the audience.

Gay square dancing troupe. And Carl Kasell.

I chatted with a few members of the troupe while we were in line for autographs and photos with Carl. They have clubs around the world and an international association and they take fun field trips outside of practicing their hobby of dance. Clearly they're my kind of people.

At the home again, with apologies to Willie Nelson

I wish I had kept stats on our beach-to-Midwest road trip just to quantify how ridiculous of a plan it was, but I didn't so I'll now estimate a few stats for you ...

14 days
10 states (three of them we crossed through twice) ***
3,000 miles of driving
4 MLB games and stadiums
12ish fast food stops
2 soccer games listened to on the radio
7ish podcasts listened to in the car
1 taping of an NPR show
2 Stieg Larsson books devoured by the MLM (you know, The Girl Who ... books)
1 stop at Ikea
1 million calories of junk food and beer ... well, maybe 2 million

Did I enjoy it? A million times yes. Was I glad we went? Absolutely. Will I ever do it again? Hell effin no.

Oh, I'll do road trips again. I love road trips because they allow me to see new places, new things, new landscapes. I like stopping at landmarks and national parks and scenic overlooks and such. Herein lies the problem. Have you ever roadtripped through the Midwest? I would say boring as hell, but hell is probably a hella lot more interesting than driving through the rural Midwest. Sure, the rural Midwest is beautiful in its own flat sort of way for the first 100 miles or so. Then it just gets old and painful to drive through. If we're going to be driving 3,000 miles, I need the scenery to change more frequently or at least give me some cows to look at.

I will give the Midwest credit for something, it's an expert when it comes to cities. I've loved Chicago since I first step foot in it. I love St. Louis. I discovered on this trip that I love Milwaukee and that Columbus, Ohio, is way more tolerable than I would have expected. Fortunately, those cities made the hundreds of cornfields and wind turbines worth it.

The Modern Love Machine and I neither killed each other nor eloped on the trip. We managed our time together wisely and still enjoyed each other's company by the time we were headed for Knoxville (or at least, that's how I feel ... I guess I could have him do a post sharing his own feelings).

Still, we were gladish to get home. I say gladish because as wonderful as sleeping in my own bed and sitting on my own couch may sound after two weeks on the road, the air conditioning fairies did not come to fix our AC while we were gone, dang it! Which made Monday night a very restless and unpleasant night. Oh, and the couch I ordered almost 10 weeks ago from a local furniture store still hasn't been delivered, so no couch to sit on.

But now, we at least have cool air in the house again and we're mostly unpacked and the fridge has been restocked and the laundry is almost done. The moving fairies also neglected to show up while we were gone to unpack what was remaining from last month's move, and I'm trying to find the number for the painting fairies, but I'll have a little more free time for the next six weeks or so. I have more stories and some photos to share from the trip, which I promise, promise, promise I will do in a few posts this week. I still have many posts which must be shared with you.

In the mean time, tell me what I've missed! I'm trying to get caught up on my blogreader, but if you have big news or an interesting post that needs to be read five minutes ago, please let me know.

***I passed through the cities and states where many of you live, and I missed getting to see you. For that I am sorry. We were on a super-tight schedule and ended up seeing only the people we stayed with along the way because that's how the dice fell. My next trips to your fair city/state will be more leisurely and I will do a better job of getting to see you, my friends.